Martha Stewart-Bin Laden
I was rifling through my glove compartment today in search of a pair of sunglasses when I found a folded-up piece of paper containing the following list:
• Blue poster board
• White poster board – 5 pieces
• Rope
• Hook
• Gold paper
• 8 “C” batteries
The strange thing is that this list was written in my own handwriting, and yet I have absolutely no recollection of creating it, and cannot for the life of me imagine what it was for. This makes me wonder if I suffer from some sort of dissociative identity disorder, and one of my personalities is either really into arts and crafts, or is a terrorist.
I’m kind of afraid to be alone with myself. This must be what it feels like to be a werewolf.
Filed under: General on July 20th, 2008
July 20th, 2008 at 11:19 pm
I think you’d be a pretty kick ass terrorist.
July 21st, 2008 at 1:12 am
You know, nothing on the list is that alarming by itself, but the combination of hook, rope and batteries? Yeah. I’m a little worried about you.
July 21st, 2008 at 1:15 am
That looks like the parts list for the last helicopter I tried to make.
(Note: do not attempt to make a helicopter using only the parts on that list. It turns out badly. Trust me.)
July 21st, 2008 at 1:22 am
i found a list that i made once that made no sense to me either. i had to really dig through my brain to come up with why i had written it. cracked me up!
http://dixonsturkey.blogspot.com/2007/10/list.html
what would martha stewart-bin laden do with all that stuff? i can only imagine.
July 21st, 2008 at 2:24 am
Either that, or you are having MacGyver flashbacks. I can see it now… Jenny behind a trap door under the escalator at the train station as she pulls off her backpack and rifles through her supplies. The smell of warm electrical wires and bearing grease permeates the air as the gray-haired janitor mops his way across the terrace. She finds just what she needs to rescue the giant chocolate bunny from its plate-glass prison. Wrapping the foil around… lol
July 21st, 2008 at 6:02 am
You’re MacGyver! I knew it!
Are we allowed to speculate on what it’s for?
July 21st, 2008 at 6:56 am
For the life of me, I can’t think of anything anymore that takes C or D batteries… except possibly a flashlight. Are you going exploring for treasure?D
July 21st, 2008 at 7:10 am
sarah: thank you – finally, someone recognizes my talents!
shari: i know – who buys a hook and rope?
vahid: if balsa wood were on the list, then i would know it was intended to be a flying machine.
natalie: love the list! until i read your comments, my guess was that they were ideas for some really weird blog entries.
dave: oh, the giant chocolate bunny! how i wish i could steal him!
kapgar: i wish you would speculate – i seriously have no idea!
dave2: you know, that’s a good point – what the heck takes C batteries anymore? and eight of them!?!?
July 21st, 2008 at 7:22 am
Eight “C” batteries?
I’m surprised there are things that still use C’s. There may not be eight left in the entire world. Maybe not being able to find C batteries is the thing that foiled your terrorist craft/plot.
July 21st, 2008 at 8:00 am
Maybe you were making a list of things that you’d never need. You know, just in case.
July 21st, 2008 at 8:49 am
That’s funny.
July 21st, 2008 at 12:00 pm
You’re a very flashy terrorist, it seems. Most terrorists are satisfied with any color of paper, but not you, nooooooooooo, your paper has to be gold because HEY, LOOK AT ME, I’M JENNY AND YOU’D BETTER RECOGNIZE MY DEADLY WILLINGNESS TO BLOW SHIT UP.
July 21st, 2008 at 12:00 pm
You’re a very flashy terrorist, it seems. Most terrorists are satisfied with any color of paper, but not you, nooooooooooo, your paper has to be gold because HEY, LOOK AT ME, I’M JENNY AND YOU’D BETTER RECOGNIZE MY DEADLY WILLINGNESS TO BLOW SHIT UP.
July 21st, 2008 at 12:17 pm
Dear Jenny,
Homeland Security will now be reading RunJenRun regularly.
Love,
Vivian
July 21st, 2008 at 8:29 pm
Something like this happened to Jennifer Garner in the last season of Alias, I think. Only she woke up in China and her boyfriend who thought she was dead had married someone else. So what I’m saying is, things could be worse.
July 21st, 2008 at 10:44 pm
Curious list. Reminds me of a time I found a note I was sure was my old roommate’s handwriting until I realized I’d written it. ‘Twas very strange.
July 22nd, 2008 at 6:44 am
delmer: you’re probably right. my last terrorist plot was spoiled when i couldn’t find betamax tapes.
avitable: that’s what my grocery lists typically look like: “vegetables, fresh fruit, soy milk, plain oatmeal…” all the things i’m not going to buy.
travis: it’s only funny until i take over the world with my… battery powered… shiny… grappling hook thingy!
sir: that’s because i was featured on an episode of “queer eye for the terrorist cell” – changed my life.
vivian: well that’s just great! good thing i deleted my “goodreads” account – i don’t need the government knowing that i actually liked the fountainhead.
cheryl: yeah, but she got to wear all those great wigs, so who’s really worse off?
claire: that’s kind of single white female creepy!
July 22nd, 2008 at 12:19 pm
If you had adult diapers on that list, I’d think your other personality worked for NASA and was jealous of your co-workers girlfriend…
July 22nd, 2008 at 9:59 pm
You have no idea what my dirty, sick mind thought of when I read that list. I just wouldn’t want my comment deleted.
July 23rd, 2008 at 9:13 am
“This must be what it feels like to be a werewolf” – HAH!!!