Shattered
It’s only been a short while, but every song I hear reminds me of you, and of what we could have had. I felt you slipping away, but I didn’t know how to stop you. What hurts most is that I’m not sure you ever knew how much you meant to me, and now it’s too late.
When I got home today, I wanted to write you a letter, but all the perfect lines have already been written, so I decided to make you a playlist to tell you how I feel.
I started off with some classic Beatles,
Yesterday,
All my troubles seemed so far away,
Now it looks as though they’re here to stay,
Oh, I believe in yesterday.
Then led into Sinead O’Connor’s Nothing Compares 2 U
It’s been so lonely without you here
Like a bird without a song
Nothing can stop these lonely tears from falling
Tell me baby where did I go wrong?
Simon and Garfunkel spoke to me next
Hello darkness, my old friend,
Ive come to talk with you again,
Because a vision softly creeping,
Left its seeds while I was sleeping,
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence
He gets a bad rap, but no one knows a broken heart like Phil Collins.
So take a look at me now, oh there’s just an empty space
And there’s nothing left here to remind me,
Just the memory of your face
Ooh take a look at me now, well there’s just an empty space
And you coming back to me is against all odds
and that’s what I’ve got to face
Kansas seemed appropriate after that
Don’t hang on, nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky
It slips away, and all your money won’t another minute buy.
Dust in the wind, all we are is dust in the wind
Dust in the wind, everything is dust in the wind.
I can always rely on the 80’s to help me express my true feelings:
Who’s gonna pick you up
When you fall
Who’s gonna hang it up
When you call
Who’s gonna pay attention
To your dreams
Who’s gonna plug their ears
When you scream
Goodbye, my love. These were the greatest six weeks of my life. Your candle burned out long before your legend ever did.
Rest in Peace
March 18, 2009 – May 2, 2009
Memorial services will be held at the Apple store on Michigan Ave tomorrow at 7:00pm. In lieu of flowers, please send candy. Lots and lots of candy.
Filed under: General on May 3rd, 2009
May 3rd, 2009 at 11:44 pm
I only regret that I didn’t get to know the deceased as well as I should have.
May 4th, 2009 at 1:12 am
I thought you’d just stopped blogging forever, but look! I found you!
TequilaCon looks like it was great fun this year! I should have just come down anyway and been the designated driver. Why didn’t I think of that sooner? Agh.
I’ve been over that bridge. It’s the highest bridge span in the US, right? I was fascinated with all the suicide tributes on land, on either end of the bridge: the candles and the sun-bleached plastic flowers and bead-strung crosses. It seemed to me that there are roadside car accident shrines every few miles or so throughout New Mexico.
Anyhoo, glad you are still blogging!
May 4th, 2009 at 12:52 pm
Oh Jenny. A little Air Supply seems only appropriate to the occasion:
“It was every cellphone in the world, to me. It’s my fantasy, it’s my reality. Yeah, it’s every cellphone in the world, to me.”
Condolences on your unspeakable loss.
(Get it? “Unspeakable”? Heh. I crack myself up.)
May 4th, 2009 at 1:21 pm
Ooh, that second photo… ouch. But I can’t look away!
May 4th, 2009 at 5:12 pm
vahid: she was dearly loved in her brief time, that’s for sure.
asia: nope, i’m still alive and blogging, it’s just that my RSS feeds won’t work so no one knows i have a blog anymore. i hope that this doesn’t take me as long to fix as the comment “remember me” function did! and you TOTALLY should’ve been our 8.5 month pregnant designated driver! were were constantly commenting on the roadside memorials all across NM. that, coupled with all the DUI billboards makes me think they have a lot of drunk driving deaths there.
shari: i crack myself up. crack? is that supposed to be some kind of joke? this is no time for levity! can’t you see that i will never love again?!
claire: it’s really painful, isn’t it? amazingly, it still works, but it makes me sad to look at it.
May 4th, 2009 at 7:59 pm
The tiny shroud and mini cross are so cute-yet-disturbing. Like a baby coffin. Okay, maybe not exactly like a baby coffin.
May 4th, 2009 at 9:03 pm
That is the saddest thing I have ever seen.
May 4th, 2009 at 9:55 pm
i have dreams of doing that to my phone sometimes…
May 5th, 2009 at 4:47 am
WE CAN REBUILD HER. WE HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY. WE CAN MAKE HER BETTER THAN SHE WAS. BETTER… STRONGER… FASTER…
May 5th, 2009 at 3:43 pm
I am truly sorry for your loss. I made my boyfriend read this post, his instant reaction was ‘I need to get my iphone insured’. Try to take solace in the thought that you are helping to prevent others from this terrible tragedy.
May 5th, 2009 at 11:42 pm
cheryl: eww – creepy! but my relationship with my iPhone was much less maternal, and far more fiery, possessive european lover. it was doomed to end badly from the beginning.
nikki: it’s true that time helps ease the pain.
noe: i have dreams of doing that to my work computer all the time.
dave2: is there an app that will give me bionic vision?
serap: thank you. and if my cautionary tale can save even one iPhone, then it will have all been worth it.
May 6th, 2009 at 5:41 pm
I have no words for your loss.
*sniff*
May 6th, 2009 at 10:05 pm
Are you responsible enough to have another one? I think maybe not.